Sandy's Ramblings

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Why not to travel by bus unless you must...

I am a smoker. Recently, however, I am on a campaign to cut down quite dramatically and so far so good... I was smoking roughly a pack a day and last week I decided to try to smoke a maximum of 10 day for a week, then 8 a day for a week etc. The 10-a-day week went well (some days I smoked only 8 or 9) and yesterday was my first 8-a-day day. I had 6. Anyways, this is relevant.

I've now travelled on many a Chinese bus. Generally speaking, if the trip is 4 hours or less you're onto a winner. Sadly, China is big and short bus trips rare. The other day we were in Lijiang and needed to get to where we are now, Chengdu. The only option (due to the mountains getting in the way) was to bus to a small industrial town called Panzhihua and then hopefully catch a train to Chengdu. To our great dismay, it is the tail-end of the Chinese New Year week-long holiday, and everyone is trying to get home.

We arrived after almost 8 hours on the bus in Panzhihua quite grossed out. The trip was very winding and up and down the mountains (200km took almost 8 hours...) and someone vomited half-way into the trip. The smell was pervasive and stuck for the rest of the trip. Apart from that though, the trip was good and the scenery quite spectacular.

We got to Panzhihua and we on local bus 64 to the train station when we met an Israeli couple who had arrived (doing the same thing as us) a few hours earlier and reported to us the sad news that the first available train ticket to Chengdu was 4 March, about a week's wait. The only accommodation we could find was the Panzhihua hotel which is somewhat beyond our usual budget we decided to spend one night and then, by hook or by crook, get the hell out.

The next morning we got up early, had a sterling breakfast in the hotel (one plus side, although salted duck eggs are not nearly as good as they sound) and motored off to the bus station to see what tickets we could get. We got one for 1pm and were thrilled. Short lived.

At 12.30, having returned to the hotel, checked out and returned again to the bus station, we waited eagerly for 1 o'clock to come our way. The bus station waiting is fairly jacked up, although filthy, and they have nice electronic signs above each door showing which bus goes where and when. Not one mentioned ours. We kept bugging the luggage check guy about it and he kept responding mutely to us with a hand motion that seemed to indicate "Wait here", with increasing annoyance. So we waited. At about 12.58pm a kind soul, looking stressed, came running up to us and asked if we were going to Chengdu. "Yes" was our obvious response, and he shepherded us to our bus which was marked with a different destination on the front (but did mention two of the main places we'd be passing through). Somehow all the other passengers had managed to divine their way to this bus, but either way we got there. 20 minutes late, the bus departed. I must mention that the seats were pretty comfy.

It was a typical bus with a television, about 40 seats and windows that you can't open. We got going and immediately all the men on the bus light up cigarettes. This never stopped for all of the 18 hours it took to get to Chengdu. It's really fun, despite being a smoker myself (I never smoked on the bus, gloat gloat), to be breathing in second-hand smoke in a confined bus. Add to that that the guy behind us kept using our seats as a means to stand up and every now and then would whack us accidentally on the head in doing so. There was a small window at the far back of the bus on either side which could open, and an old man who looked like a monk was sitting at one a few rows behind us and seemed to have this habit, or a tic, or perhaps he was sick, of churning up a big phlegm-ball and spitting it out the window, every 2 or 3 minutes, the WHOLE WAY. I don't know how he managed this - I was impressed by his stamina and his ability to produce so much moisture in his mouth. Of course, in true Chinese style, this churn and spit skill is not a silent one, it is in fact unbelievably loud. Great fun to listen to while you're fanning smoke out of your face.

On the plus side, no-one vomited on the trip. On the down side, they used the television to show us hour upon hour of Chinese karaoke at full volume. I'm starting to recognise, and despise, many of their songs. We did have about 2 hours of peace at one point when they switched off the TV - perhaps it broke? After a dinner break, we got back on and were treated to a movie that was actually not dubbed into Chinese called 'The Marine'... anyone seen it? If you haven't, don't. It is the worst film I can remember seeing.

Gabi and I took some stomach nausea pills which had the handy side-effect of extreme drowsiness (our reason for taking them) and so, at around 1am, we sort of slept through the rest until we arrived at 7.30 or so this morning in Chengdu.

So, don't take a Chinese bus unless you must.

Of the Chinese toilet...

Hmmm. This is a topic I've been avoiding almost as much as I try to avoid Chinese toilets. But, as with the toilets themselves, it cannot be avoided forever.

Firstly, there is a big distinction in China between a toilet and a "western" toilet. A "western" toilet is quite simply a toilet as we know it - a ceramic seat-like thing with (when you're lucky) a seat and a flushing mechanism. The provision of toilet paper is almost entirely unheard of. When you find one of these toilets, you sit down and push with all your might because it is a luxury that is hard to pass up.

Chinese toilets come in a variety of flavours. The most common of the lot is a simple ceramic-lined hole in the floor which, oddly enough, has a flushing mechanism - it is not a long drop. Did you know the Chinese invented the flushing toilet? Hard to believe. Anyway, the ceramic hole is, in my opinion, backwards. You do your business on the ceramic ledge near the water pipe and then you flush. If you're lucky, most of the goodness actually flushes away but generally only 50% to 80% actually does, leaving a treat for the next customer. Also, since it is a hole in the floor, you need to squat over it. I cannot squat, I am simply not supple enough - but if you watch the Chinese people they are masters at this. They choose a squat position as a standard waiting pose while I prefer a chair. They squat with both feet firmly planted flat on the ground and so for them it is actually comfortable and they can sit like that for ages with no problem. I have about 20 seconds before my legs start giving way. Interestingly though, apparently it is better for you to crap in a squat position than seated on the throne.

Moving on. The next Chinese toilet reminds me of some old Roman toilets I saw a few years ago in some ruins in Turkey. It is basically a gutter running around the room at a slight incline. You pick your spot and go for it (no privacy here, no doors, just dividing walls). Naturally, the flushing mechanism here is not nearly strong enough (if at all existent) and so there are plenty of faeces for you to examine at your leisure (or take photos of, in my case, don't ask). These rooms generally don't smell so good.

My favourite toilet of all though is the one you find at stops along bus routes - the ones which are really more like long drops that are never cleaned.

I close with a photo.



Enjoy your lunch.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Somewhat unexpected news...

Back on the road again after a few weeks in South Africa. I left SA on 31 January and got into Hong Kong after a very exciting 3 hour coffee break in Singapore airport. In Hong Kong I met up with Gabi, Lihi (Israeli friend from Beijing) and Deepak (Indian Hong Konger also met in Beijing) and spent two pretty crazy days running around sorting out visas for China and seeing the sights. Gabi, Lihi and I then caught a ferry over to Macau for another 2 nights (we actually won some money in Casino Lisboa...) before a mad series of buses and a ferry to get to Sanya in Hainan island, the big island just off the south coast of China quite near to Vietnam. This seems to be China's beach resort place and is actually quite nice by Chinese standards. Basically just bumming about on the beach here and enjoying the sun. Chinese new year and spring festival start in just over a week and so we need to start making some plans and bookings because I believe that things get somewhat out of control at that time. We're thinking of heading north to Guilin which the Chinese call 'heaven on earth' and which is apparently one of the better places to see the new year in here.

Anyway, enough travel humdrum.

The aforementioned unexpected news is that I am now officially engaged! Believe it or not, as I'm sure some of you will be somewhat incredulous, but it is true. Strictly speaking I've actually been engaged since just before I left the Philippines, but I wanted to chat some more with Gabi in person before running about telling people. We were out on the beach in Sabang on Palawan Island in the Philippines just after Christmas and having dinner at a styling bamboo restaurant, drinking rum & coke and eating a vast array of seafood (and oh so cheap...) when conversation led to the future and one thing led to another and well, we started to seriously discuss the idea and so we said 'well, shall we do it?' and so we did.

Apart from a change of status, nothing else is changing. Our travel plans are as-were (is that a word?) and so we'll still be out this way until Septemberish. After that we'll see.

A side note - how hip and modern am I announcing this on a blog? Makes one cringe.

Anyway, I'm off. A shower and some weak Chinese beer are a-calling.

Laters.